When I was younger, I dreamt so much of getting married. I had the day all planned in my head and what I would wear.
My criteria for a groom was a recipe for disaster.
Handsome, tall (the womb thing came later), rich, a big boy (Goodness knows what I thought that meant), loved me absolutely to the exception of everybody else, didn't have a big family, a good lover, a professional (only a doctor, a pilot or lawyer would do) though I could have managed a banker,lol.
I didn't gave a thought as to what his beliefs and ideals were.
And yes I know some women even older than me still have these as their criteria. But not me. At least not any longer.
I never actually gave a thought to what came after. Not the sex,lol I knew about that,but the intricacies of marriage, compromise (that art of keeping the marriage so it doesn't collapse ) is a lot of work .
And I know I would have failed woefully at if I had gotten married at that age.
My younger self was so impatient and entitled, it was my way or nothing at all. The marriage wouldn't have stood a chance.
I am thankful I got to grow up, I got to understand life cos looking back I didn't know Shit then.
I got to work on my temper, work on my attitude (I used to sulk a lot if I didn't get my way), learn how to mix with people cos I prefer being alone.
When my immediate supervisor who is also a lawyer tries some Shit with me now and I don't react, I just laugh at the realization of how far I have come. Some years back, there would have been hell to pay. I didn't like being told what to do or when to do it.
I also used to be very jealous. I still am, but I have learnt how to deal with it.
I think the inlaws would have been my first problem, then hubby would probably have gotten tired of my faults cos am Very sure I would have married the wrong person then.
In retrospect all my exes except number three would have made for a failed marriage.
Why?
Cos what I knew then,i didn't know now.
I am not miraculously changed,but I am older and very much wiser.
Thank You very much.
Post a comment below! Let me know what YOU think.
Would I have made a good wife then?
Amazing write up, thumbs up to you...Really enjoyed it
ReplyDeleteYou came over. Kind of you. Thanks for the compliments.*smiles*
DeleteHaha. You Probably wouldn't except you were with someone who was super understanding and patient. My mum talks about one of her friends who got married at 19 or so. She was pregnant when she got married, but a partier. After she gave birth, she gave the baby to her mum and husband who was older and continued like life was the same when she was single and not a mother. She'll argue with her husband about why she had to stop hanging out with her friends because she had a baby and was married. She honestly didn't see anything wrong. Her husband was patient with her though and she's always grateful that he stayed with her and helped her grow up despite her sme sme.
ReplyDeleteThats a good observation.
DeleteAn understanding and patient spouse might have made a difference in this my early fictional marriage.