Sunday, 27 July 2014

The Marriage Trap (conclusion)

Finally! Here's the concluding post to part 1 and part 2 here.

Some days after the chat, she sent me a message that her husband seized her phones and I had been chatting with her husband who apparently went berserk after he saw my messages and concluded that she had been telling tales to her friend.He reported her to his family and she had to face a series of lectures on not talking to anybody about your marriage and how friends (in this case me) could be dangerous (and steal your husband) lol.

I took my cue from that incident and didn't call her again though I hoped she was ok.
Imagine my surprise  when my phone rang a couple of days days later and it was the husband.
The long and short of it was that he was very angry that his wife opened up to me about their struggles but since I knew it already, maybe I could be of some help in spying for him.
spying things lol.            Pic source

Apparently my full time job as a lawyer wasn't enough I was to become a spy also.
My duties entailed me reporting back to him whatever his wife told me about his shortcomings so he could "improve" (beat her the more). I said ok. Afterall why am I a lawyer.
I dropped the phone and thought about my life! Kai! I have suffered.If not somebody will not come and be telling me to come and spy for him.

I admit it was tempting to play fairy godmother/meddling friend and think I could actually help the marriage.
There were like four options.
1) Do as he said and tell him what his wife said his faults were.
2) Tell the wife that her hubby wanted me to spy on him.
3)Play Double agent (lol) and report to the husband after I have told the wife my assignment. Then we could beat him at his own game.
But! One thing my mum always warned about was getting in the middle of husband and wife. In her words "they settle the fight and put you in the middle"
But what to do?
My mind was still spinning. Option one was definitely out of the way. I loved her too much to risk her finding out. She would never forgive me.
Finally I came to Option ( 4)
Do Nothing (while praying hard she wouldn't call me at all before the husband did for "follow up"
A week after,he called me. I told him truthfully that I hadn't heard from his wife. He asked me to call her and lobby for information. I told him that will look suspicious and he should just wait for her to call me.
Thankfully she didnt.And he left me alone. I am a bad spy lol.
Viv and I don't speak of the incident again.
She is still with him. No job yet for her. He probably still beats her and worst of all he's scared her from opening up to others who could help her.
The "I love my husband" posts have decreased on Viv's  facebook.
The incident thought me a great lesson. Some people are trapped into traps of their making via marriage. Its also unwise to look at marriage as a bed of roses with a happily ever after ending.

And that folks is the conclusion. For the (im)patients waiters lol.i hope you are happy.
So what's your take? What else should I have done? What would you have done?


  1. The name is Reese. Funmi Reese (as per James Bond) lol! Thank God u opted not to get involved. There is no way u would have escaped being labeled as the cause of all their marital problems. They have issues in that marriage. But so do most. It doesn't mean they r bad people. They just have to learn to solve their problems on their own. I worry that he actually feels the need to get info from u on his wife. It means they have stopped communicating, possibly cos of his abuse. They need a "reset" and only God can help them. I don't believe in divorce (my parents did it and it's the worst thing that can happen to a child). But there's not much u can do for them as a 3rd party. Just don't suggest any divorce Lawyer to ur friend. Dassall.

    1. Yep! The lack of Communication worried me felt like she resented him for not encouraging her to further her studies,find a job, the beating etc But he doesn't know that. He resents the way she talks. And who knows maybe he did really want to improve.Who knows?
      Sorry about your folks. Mine didn't have any issues when we were kids but weirdly they have had a rough patch for a while now. Things are better now sha.

  2. No mind them jare.
    I am very sure it would have boomeranged if I had gotten involved. She would have tot I was after her man if she came across my number on his phone and I hadn't mentioned it. I don turn to husband snatcher be that.
    Another reason I cut him short was that I didn't want to hear any more sordid details. They both would have tried to prove the other was worse and spilled all their secrets. I didn't want to hear any more.

  3. I want to believe this story is fiction, true or false??

  4. unfortunately its true Some wives even have worse stories.