Sunday, 3 July 2016

Funmi : The Law

That's how some people hail lawyers down here.
Or should I saw "DE LAW" . Seeing as some people change "the" to 'de".

"DE LAW ".
"DE LAW Madam is calling you". Definitely office people. No madam in my house.
"DE LAW come and buy" . Looool. This mostly when you are dressed in black attire or from sellers who know you are a lawyer.
"DE LAW. This just randomly. Some times family, sometimes co workers, sometimes friends. And you are like 'what'?
Speaking of  the Law, and all that's attached to it i.e Justice and court appearances, I have noticed one bad thing oh.

I have gone soft. 
I used to now feel sorry for some Accused persons. I don't know how the change happened oh. 
Me! That used to be like "Off with their heads" Ok exaggeration. "Wicked people"  "Life Imprisonment is what they deserve" etc.  Smh.

Now, I can't help myself, when I see them looking very morose with puppy dog eyes, batting them at you like say na me go set them free, na then you go dey hear "SISTER FUNMI or Miss .............. Or Mrs (as if say an dem give me husband). Lol. You know there is trouble when your father's mate dey greet you and calling you "sister" . 

They will greet you in the morning when they see you, they will greet you when they are leaving. Sigh! looking like they can't hurt a fly meanwhile some of them did very wicked stuff oh.
But I can't help feeling a little sympathetic sha.
And not just for the ones that know me, as in the corporate criminals wey carry me go Court oh but I feel sorry even for the ones I don't know, hardened criminals, especially when they chain the legs of five or six guys together and bring them to Court. Some of them kept in custody for years without bail because of the nature of their crime. And their trial hasn't even started.
It's true that some of them deserve it, but some are also innocent. 
Today ( the day I wrote this post -imagine I wrote this in February - not the day of posting it) we had a case in Court, our own matter don finish oh as accused persons no gree show, but I didn't leave. Na so I gum my body for seat in court dey watch proceedings. I struck up a chat with a lawyer beside me and he told me he came from Lagos to defend an accused person accused of armed robbery.

According to him, the man was innocent. They had just robbed in that area and he was unlucky.
My mouth was open. Cos na for Yoruba film I dey see say dem go curse one man, then next thing he go jam the police or night guards and be accused of armed robbery and go to prison.

No lie say you never watch am before jare. Lol.
I never see am live before sha.
I had to ask if they found a weapon with him, the lawyer said No.
How about stolen items? He said none was found.
Haha! Did anyone identify him? He said No. So why was he charged nah? 

Na real story. I wish that I stayed longer to see what happened sef because surely that cannot be the whole story. I served in the Ministry of Justice and I know they have lapses, but surely they won't be so silly or wicked even to charge a man for armed robbery ( knowing that they are sentenced to death if found guilty) on such flimsy evidence.
( edit: on second thoughts, the lawyers assertion is likely bogus jare. It is unlikely that he was charged without him being complicit knew way or the other". 

Eh hen, did you guys hear or read about the lawyer in Nigeria who killed her husband.( edit: I know this news is stale but E no stale when I write the post).
Sigh! Ironically, a staff of this same Ministry of Justice.
I was incredulous when I heard. I wasn't sure if it was deliberate or temporary insanity. 
Serious! It's hard being a prosecutor oh. And thank God I don't have to prosecute murderers and 
hardened criminals. I for don resign since. But for someone who does that on a daily basis (seriously! Ministry of Justice people are almost always in Court everyday because the lawyers where I live are assigned to different courts) to end up as a defendant is unbelievable to me. Weirder still is the fact that one of her colleagues or her bosses will be assigned the case to prosecute to the best of their ability.
And even though people are saying they may be partial, you have no idea how difficult it will be for the prosecutor and the judge assigned the case. Even her colleagues. In one of the pics of the days she was taken back to the murder scene, I spied one of her colleagues and probably friend standing with her.
For those who didn't hear of the murder, a man was killed by his lawyer wife, a prosecutor.
Apparently they had a first fight after which she stabbed him, he was treated at the hospital and he came back home, only to be fatally stabbed by the wife.
Now she, a prosecutor, who sends convicted criminals to prison is in prison. No husband. He is dead. According to a friend who went to a university with the deceased, he was a nice guy sociable guy 
who had a privileged background, stayed in a hotel all through his Ife days and was based in France. 
He even attended my friends wedding a few years back. 
It so sad. The person who matchmade them must be biting his fingers in regret.

My mum is of the opinion that it isn't ordinary and she must have been bewitched or something. 
Lol. No mind Iya funmi oh.
She was of the opinion that it had to do with some of the cases that she was handling and probably she did "strong head" in a case she was handling and since she refused their plea/offer/ bribe, they decided to deal with her.
Don't ask me who " they" are. Lol. Ask my mum.

I didn't subscribe to the theory. But someone else said the same thing.

Honestly! I don't know what to think. As for me, I don't have the heart to judge or even place blame.

Ehn ehn! Happy new year!
Dodges shoes and slippers. Lol.
No vex nah.Shuo. 
I have been MIA. I know I know. I still love you guys. I have had a lot on my plate especially Court stuff and stepping up my game regarding my faith/religion. 
I kinda realised that I was lagging behind in that regard so I took steps to step up my game ( Lol! Why do I keep repeating steps).
I usually do better when I face one thing squarely instead of trying to be Jack of all trades. But I did miss you guys and there were a lot of times when I have just been chilling here and reading old posts and comments. And that's one reason why I didn't delete the blog. 
Let's just see how it goes. Likely my next post (God willing) will be basically gists. Lol. 

So am I forgiven?

I see some people still frowning. No vex nah. Shebi I don beg una.
This na serious matter oh. Wetin I go use beg una.

Ehn ehn! The nice people wey don forgive me. Oya come take hug. Big one. In fact everybody take. 
She I tomorrow is public holiday nah. Ok ok it's Tuesday and Wednesday but does tomorrow count.
I know for sure that few people will be productive tomorrow.
As for me I have to find a dress or attire that screams " Oga! I no come do any serious work today oh". You know, tomorrow no be the time to wear suit and be looking like na me wan find all the people wey dey steal our
Hopefully the closing early on the day preceding festive public holidays rule works tomorrow oh. Don't ask me who made that rule or if I work in a bank .
Nah!because it's gonna be invoked tomorrow. By fire by force.

Post a comment below! Let me know what YOU think.


  1. Chai, see gist. You're sha forgiven. Good to have you back

    1. Abi oh. Thank you ma. Lol.
      Your last comment on disappearing acted as a catalyst sha. Thanks for checking.

  2. Replies
    1. Amaka my love. No vex ehn. I know that head you are shaking get meaning. Lol.